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How To Get Started In Anal Sex

If you’re expressing an interest in anal sex, you’ve discovered the right place!

The act of anal sex can be an enjoyable experience for all types of people, and offers a unique avenue of sexual enjoyment for people who aren’t afraid to get a little adventurous in the sheets. Having long been stereotyped as being exclusively an interest of homosexual men the world over, changes in the paradigm of sexual openness have paved the way for both hetero and non-hetero people to enjoy this intimate experience without fear of stigmatization or shame. As one of the body’s many different erogenous zones, learning the ins and outs of anal play will bring you and your partner/s one step closer to deeper fulfillment in bed!

As it is with most forms of sex play, anal sex can be broken down into two components: preparation and equipment. The former can be defined pretty easily; preparation includes all the steps you must take in order to fully relax your sphincter muscles to the point where insertion is possible. This means you must rinse yourself out and fully evacuate your bowels first; a simple series of water or saline enemas can achieve this pretty quickly, although a regular diet high in fibrous foods and low in fats can also net this effect just as well. Improperly cleaning yourself can not only lead to some pretty bad messes and plenty of embarrassment for everyone involved, but may also lead the way to very serious bacterial infections and illnesses. As a rule of thumb, always make sure that your water is generally clear before you move on to the good stuff!

As for equipment, this covers everything from stretchers, plugs, and other toys to oils, gels and various other lubricants. We recommend against using flavored or scented lubes for toy play, as these contain additives that may cause irritation to the lining of your rectum. Never use silicone lubricants on silicone sex toys.* This causes them to rapidly deteriorate and become porous, which can lead to serious bacterial infections since they now become more difficult to clean as a result, especially if the toy is of a cheaper quality—instead, try an oil- or water-based lubricant, and if you’re able to, we sincerely recommend buying toys made of medical-grade silicone, as it is safer for insertion than toys made of jelly or vinyl.

*Based on an experience from my partner, silicone lubricants on silicone toys will also create a vacuum effect as soon as you attempt to insert. For personal safety, never combine the two!

When you’re finally ready to start putting stuff up your butt, you’ll want to gently massage the anus with a finger or two to get a handle on the sensation of something touching it, especially if you’re unused to the feeling. Remember: it’s an erogenous zone like the lips, nipples, and genitals, which means it’s meant to be pleasurable when stimulated! If that feels good to you, then we recommend slowly inserting the tip of a finger into the anus proper, no further than the first knuckle joint, then circulate the finger just as if you were rubbing on your a-spot until the sensation feels comfortable and enjoyable. You can either work your way up to a second finger, or even try using a slimmer stretching toy to keep at loosening up, but the goal is to get loose.

Once you’ve grown accustomed to the feeling of things rummaging around up there, you can then apply more lubricant as needed and keep at it, or you can transition to toys, or even the real thing. The most important aspect is to make sure your pelvic floor remains relaxed at all times; anything less will cause an involuntary reaction on the recipient’s end and may trigger unwanted squeezing, so be careful!

After you’re done playing around with your butt some, we recommend giving it a couple of days to recuperate from all the action it’s experienced. Seasoned bottoms may require less recovery time, but the general premise remains identical throughout: take care of your tushy, and it’ll never treat you wrong.

We hope that you find some of the information herein valuable and would love to hear from you if you found this post helpful! Feel free to contact us discreetly via email.

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